Parashat Yithro - True Kindness

Hey everyone!

I hope all is well. There was a lot of excitement here in Israel earlier this week. It will be interesting to see how everything unfolds. I've been trying to figure out how the whole political system works in Israel. It's complicated.

In any event, now to the more important stuff. I have a very quick, short D'var Torah with an unbelievable message.

We are first introduced to the Aseret HaDiberot (Ten Commanments) this week, in Parashat Yithro. The first commandment was, "Anochee Hashem Elokecha" - "I am Hashem, your G-d." The second commandment, "Lo yihye lecha elokim acherim..." - "You should not have any other gods." The first two commandments tell us that we must believe in Hashem, and not believe in any other god or deity.

I hate to get all grammatical, but these first two commandments were given in singular. "I am your G-d," and the word "your" was in singular, almost as though Hashem was only speaking to one person. Similarly, "You should not have any other gods," and the word "you" was in singular, almost as if Hashem were only conveying this message to an individual.

Chazal tell us that this was a way out, a get out of jail free card, a defense, when we sinned with the Golden Calf. As we all know, soon after hearing the Ten Commandments, we molded an idol out of gold in the shape of a calf. And we went against those first two commandments. We lost belief in Hashem, and we served another god. But what was our defense? We claimed that Hashem was only speaking with Moshe Rabbeinu, A"H. When Hashem spoke in singular form to Moshe, it seemed as though Moshe was the only one forbidden to serve another god. So the Jewish people couldn't be held responsible! They were never told that they cannot serve this idol. Although it sounds as though we were playing dumb, and we were, we were undoubtedly exonerated. (You might be wondering why we were punished. All of this shouldn't be taken at face value. Obviously, we were held accountable. But there is a message to learn from this when our Sages teach us something like this.)

Why did Hashem give over the commandments in singular form? Why did He speak to Moshe alone?

Imagine you were doing someone a favor. Imagine there was a very poor man, and he had no home or clothing. You bring him into your house, give him food, a shower, a place to sleep, give him some pocket money, and just give him everything you have to offer. And he takes the food and money that you offered him and just throws it away. He then turns around, spits in your face, and leaves. Would you be angry? Why? Why would you be offended? After all, if he doesn't want the favor, why does that upset you? He could continue living in poverty, but you will still take in personally. Who's the one losing out here? He is! So why are you angry?

The answer is obvious. When a person does an act of kindness for another, he invests himself into it. It gives him a sense of joy to feel that he is helping someone else. Someone can actually be very selfish when he is doing a seemingly selfless act. And if you don't want to accept his selfless gesture, then he will be offended, which manifests that it may have a small tinge of selfishness mixed in.

Not so with Hashem. He took us out of enslavement. Performed miracles left and right, for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Took care of everything for us. Sent us out with riches. Splits the sea, and annihilates the enemy before our very eyes. He then reveals Himself to us, in a revelation that He has never done before. Some act of kindness, no? But that's not what makes it special. What makes this a special act of kindness, a G-dly act of kindness, is that when revealing Himself to us and forbidding idolatry, He already gives us a way out. He wants us to be able to turn around, spit in His face, serve an idol, and be able to claim that we did absolutely nothing wrong. Hashem forbade serving idols to Moshe Rabbeinu alone because He was doing a completely selfless act. If we don't want the Torah, Hashem wouldn't be offended. There was no trace of selfishness in this act. There would be no personal joy or thrill when bestowing us with this benevolence. It was all for one reason - it was all for us. And if that meant that we would turn around and spit in His face, so be it. Hashem loves us that much that all he wants to do is to give, and that's all He does.

(It is interesting to note that the Torah calls burying someone "true kindness." It is for this very reason. He is not expecting anything in return because the recipient of his act of kindness in no longer in this world to repay him.)

Two things to think about: (1) Think about how much Hashem loves you. The only proof needed to know this fact is that you are living, not to mention all the times that He just gives to us, selflessly. (2) Think about what real kindness should be. Next time you offer to do someone a favor, try to take your self out of the picture and act completely out of your care for the receiving party. If he doesn't want it, you should in no way be offended, because that means that you were actually selfish all along.

Shabbat Shalom! Take care.

Adam Sabzevari

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